Cousin Brian - Closer to Dog (2015)

There is an innate felicity associated with purchasing and collecting records. Some enjoy spending entire evenings on the floor of their favorite local spot, sifting through cardboard discount bins of 45's hidden beneath the main displays. Every time a gem surfaces, a bit of their inner self dies happy. Others eagerly lie in wait for online deals in an attempt to triumph over the pesky, ever rising retail and shipping costs of wax. Perhaps my fondest record collecting moment was when I received my first ever music mail call. I had a shitty plinth and and a few other 7"s I had picked up at shows. My choices we're limited but there was nothing else in my mind that could compete with the idea of building a physical collection of music that I would never tire of and certainly never get rid of. Well for whatever reason I decided my first mail order would be from a lesser known, yet robust in spirit, label from Philadelphia called Evil Weevil (sadly now defunct). All I had ordered was a Cousin Brian 7" that up until that evening, was completely unknown to me. I could not say what prompted me to order it other than impulse control problems. There was a hand written thank you note in the package. The art had been done by one of the band members and the only markings on the 7" itself was an "A" scribbled on one side to annote which was which. It couldn't get any more authentic and I couldn't have been any more excited to drop the needle on it. The tracks were concise, branded by hurried licks with poppy undertones and clumsy drum's played on a kit that seemed as though it might have been kept upright by bubblegum and band-aids.

Thankfully, four years later, not much has changed. Their new (sophmore) LP gives off the same vibes at a slightly more reluctant pace. Unfortunately, their struggles to find a label that will adopt their baby means that these nine tracks may never feel the warm sunlight pouring in through the windows of a record store. However, they will surely be available for purchase online soon. Free samples below!

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Windian Subscription Series #3

If garage punk was a Christian denomination, Windian Records would be among it's patron saints. They've given one and all to further it's cause, spreading ideals of well-being and pleasure-having through bitter, virulent hooks driven by lead-footed gusto. But perhaps what really sets the crew behind this acclaimed label apart from it's fellow proletariats is the FUCKING RIGHTEOUS 7" Subscription Series they've come up with. $40 (after shipping) gets you six of their latest 7" releases, each essential in their own right. I won't delve into specifics as the music speaks for itself. All I can say is if you are looking for tantalizing, new ways to turn your brain into mush, turn your attention towards this choice bundle.

BUY IT HERE

(The first, equally enticing series is still available as well.)

Canyon Spree - Garden of Evil (2015)

Ever have that dream where you are trapped inside a tower, endlessly hiking up an ornate spiral staircase. Legs weak, breathing sparse, a distant melody compels you to trudge on. Organs and twangy guitars complete each other, echoing and lingering in your cochlea. An ocean of tranquilizing sound flowing into ribbon like streams of reverberation. This may just describe the way I feel when I lay back in bed and let this wonderful new LP by Canyon Spree carry me away. Similar dream states can be achieved by clicking the play button below.

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Jaromil Sabor & Prêcheur Loup - You Shall Use Your Time​.​.​.​ And Your Mama's Too (2014)

The first order of business in mending the damage I've done to my readership and all of the bands I should have been telling about you since my last post, is to peddle some noise you may have missed from around the time I abandoned you all. Jaromil Sabor & Prêcheur Loup is a breath of fresh air. The somewhat stale state garage has fallen into could be seen as dissapointing to some (though sometimes I can still get into it). Unwavering amp presets played at invariable speeds make up entire discographies of bands that could have been something so much more. Huffing paint, pounding this swill you call PBR and the idea of simply not giving any fucks have seemlingly taken over garage rock culture to a point that the music itself isn't important anymore. There is also no doubt that many bands have become known or respected by copying an established sound, knowing people would eat it up (there are too many Oh Sees copycats to count).

I really am sorry if you've been caught up in all that menial tomfoolery (yep, I said it), but you should know that you don't have to be a slave to it. There still exist bands that are strapping on their songwriting hats and making music that more than just satisfies, it seduces and suckerpunches right in the gut. It induces raw emotions in it's listeners. Jaromil Sabor & Prêcheur Loup is one such group. Of course there are clear influences, but they have carved these tracks out of something very unique. Each one sets itself apart from the others with just a dab of Elmers to keep it all together. Alternating between hard-driven beats living underneath crudely knarled vocals and balmy sun soakers that make you wishful of calm summer days made complete with endless opportunities to just sit and soak in the world around you. You may be thinking, "wow, this sounds like a bit of a rollercoaster", but I can assure you the finished package actually flows quite well.

I think these guys are more than fitting for my first post back from the dead so check the stream below. However, if you are still worried that you might be drowning in bullshit, I got plenty more coming up for you soon (for real).



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Frantic City

31Ø8 - S/t (2014)

Trouble In Mind seems to go through phases during which they find and pluck musicians and groups that fall into somewhat specific genres. When I first fell in love with the label they were crushing it release after release with garage punk staples from chumps like CoCoComa (whom the Roe's head up), Sonic Chicken 4 and Charlie & The Moonhearts among so many others. They have not forgotten the days of ripped jeans developed from spending so much time shredding on your knees, however, their current lineup is driven more by druggy dissertation, klutzy but melodic riffs and a connection you can feel deep down inside with the artist. Tyler Zypreksa aka 31Ø8 has created what is possibly the most focused of their newer releases. Every strum and sunny synth drop is made alone in the intimacy of his bedroom, a place where absolutely nothing is holding him back, and it shows. Check the free sample below and snag the LP (along with as many other TIM releases that you can afford) on some pretty hott flourescent pink vinyl here.



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Trouble In Mind

Druggy Pizza - Chili Cheese Crust (2014)

Druggy Pizza is Cédric Bottacchi whom you know for superintending squalid French freakazoids, Dusty Mush. His solo stylee does not stray far from those curdled, drowning-in-reverb slabs of cross-grained static. Instead, perhaps his sole mission is to redeem the pizza band, a theme utterly shat on by an actor pretending to be two things he is not, funny and musical. This seering speed-play will leave you upside down in a ditch with nothing but a slice of sausage and pepperoni to keep your genitals warm. Grab your free download below.


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White Lodge - Technicolour Visions EP (2014)

So I've missed the blog train on this one as you have probably seen this EP floating around, however, last time I shared their music I spent the whole time spewing untimely rhetoric about how nobody wants to earn their way in life anymore. I'm not going to link it, it's boring. White Lodge maintains the "It's all good holmes, here is some more free music" approach that suits their listeners so well, but I would be doing the band another huge disservice if I continued on about monetary bullshit. These guys take candy-coated pop punk strummers and throw them in a blender with a pinch of eternal darkness. Their roots ooze of metallic screams and deep stairwell double bass, but the finished package is much lighter at heart. Like an unexpected kiss on the cheek from the hottie across the way, every moment listening to these guys is a moment you will want back with a vengeance.

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Wiener Records (Cassette)

Golden Pelicans - S/t LP (2014)

The Golden Pelicans tromp out any flickering glimpse of normalcy left in your already damnable thoughts. Their latest LP is a dilapidated frenzy of downright nasty crashes, quick clatter and shouting to the point of falling over. Outburst conquers serenity in what will surely be remembered as a grubby garage punk staple. Free samples:

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Total Punk

Traps PS - Pure Truth 7" (2014)

Traps PS is spastic funk punk, high-g training in a centrifuge of calculated rhythm and cogent back beats. Their latest 7" EP does not falter. Each lick explodes like a bouncing betty on an upward trajectory. Computative drumming and sonorous vocals are the blast shield, containing and rearranging the madness. Stream it below and snag the wax here.



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Papermade

Travel Check - 66$ 7" (2014)

Travel Check is free and easy mid-summer, mid-week day off music. Providing the energy needed to motivate you to go out and do something worthwhile, but also placid enough to set the mood for your journey. Sunny and sweet but also frivolous and spontaneous. Not a worry to be had or a penny to be made. Download the 4 track EP for free below and snag the wax here.

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Howlin' Banana

Public Service Announcement: Leave Your Phone At Home!

Guys, GUYS! What are you doing!? I really want to keep this blog on track, but this shit is important, so please listen the fuck up! Stow your goddamn phones while attending concerts. This is not a request, it is an order. I am okay with you snapping a single, as in ONE photograph at some point during the show, you know, as something to remember it by. However, thrusting up your fat fucking arms over and over, thus further blocking the view of people behind you, to take a panorama that looks like my cat wiped her ass on it or 60 seconds of incomprehensible video is simply unacceptable. 95% of all shows have a photographer present who will take significantly better photos than you could ever dream of, and will make them accessible via the internet within a day. What's worse yet is the butt fuckers who are scrolling through their various social media drone feeds while the band is playing. Go home you twat! Your actions are disrespectful and only make me wonder why you even bothered coming to the show, you're clearly not enjoying yourself. 

Guys, you are not doing the band or yourself any favors by having your phone out at a concert so stuff it in your cum stained pockets already and get into the music. Watch the band with your eyeballs and maybe even dance. Afterwords talk to the musicians at the merch table rather than running home and tagging them on facebook. Real life interactions are more valuable than you could possibly imagine, and I get the idea they mean a lot to the bands, you know, actually getting to know their fan base. Alright, that's more than enough ranting. More dope ass music recommendations to be posted soon.

Jehosaphat Blow LP's and Singles

Rasping and rip-roaring one-man banders are few and far between these days. They deliver a robust and vigorous sound that most musicians would not attempt without help from a couple of their friends. They keep it simple but fetching, surmounting the pressure to have it be at all cohesive. Having left his cohorts behind to relocate several times in the past, Jehosaphat Blow is now playing outsider in Prague, a city that has little to no appreciation for garage rock. His jams are fired off with a hair trigger, blistering all that they singe. Once it is over your paltry carcass will have been reduced to ashes, scattering like they were being poured into a wind tunnel that blows farts. A fucking fart tunnel. Download all of his releases for FREE below and send him a message on facebook saying how thankful you are. It's not every day someone gives you a gift as sterling and stupefying as his.

Natural Kicks for Hand People LP (2014)

Natural High for Low People LP (2012)

Oh Ya Oh Ya 7" (2012)

Hipshaking Hangover Cure No. 69 7" (2010)

Sapin - Radio Hits (2013)

This record is an overflowing effervescence of sunshine and vivacity. Deep, boisterous guitar riffs coated in reverb, clacking drum sticks and crashing ride cymbals, sometimes at a feverish pace and other times nonchalant. Aberrant vocals are the thoughtfully placed cherry on top. In the wake of every song, you're left lifeless on a secluded beach, the tide bringing each wave closer and closer. Soon you'll be washed away by it's rich, prismatic vibes. Enjoy below and pick up the cassette here.

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Thee Mighty Fevers - Fuck'in Great R'n'R LP (2013)

1-2-3-4 Dead. You've just been massacred by some of the raunchiest carcinogenic garage punk out there. Thee Mighty Fevers of Kobe, Japan will take a potato masher to your cerebrum. They will bathe your face in hydrochloric acid. Their jeering vocals and vigorous riffs will leave you in a puddle on the pavement getting slurped up by the neighborhood hounds. Don't skip on it fuckers, wax to be had here.

And here is a more recently released split 7" with The Morbeats on Italian label, One Chord Wonder
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Deadbeat

The Instigation - No Way Out EP (2014)

I don't usually get too into hardcore punk, but this apeshit concoction is exactly what I need in my ears when I'm ready to punch your grisly mug with all my (finite) strength. This is something I've found myself wanting to do more and more since moving to this piss bucket of a town. The New York music scene is a big fucking disappointment, swirling a grimy toilet bowl of shit-brained, repetitive electronic music and half-assed-hipster indie slop. When a solid punk rock band does come to town, a reprehensible crowd of maybe fifteen sad sacks forms around the back of the room. If the band is offensive in any way, the crowd thins even further. It's fucking pathetic! To get back on track, this band is about as mutt as they come with members spawning from the UK, Canada and Japan (and thankfully nowhere near NYC). Clear-cut pandemonium and freak fuck babble cannons through your skull at a hundred miles per hour. Jam out on it and ready yourself for a good skull fuckin'.



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Sultan Bathery - S/t (2014)

Slovenly's got your balls in a vice grip this year and you'd be straight stupid to skip on a single thing they are putting out. Up next (February 25th) is this eye soldering, brain cell disintegrating heap of an LP. Sultan Bathery will kick you square in the ass crack, leaving behind a gaping hole that will scare your boyfriend straight with an overload of discombobulation and pure animosity. Attempting your beloved butt sex will be like dropping a penny down a mine shaft. I shit you not, this LP with kick you in the ass so hard you'll be in a tailspin for days. Enough talk, hit play and crank the noise!


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Slovenly

Heaters - EP (2014)

Is reverb coated, fuzz studded, hard driven garage psych getting better and better as time goes on? I would argue that it is. And these fully drenched reprobates have got it down to a mother fuckin' science. These are the sort of tracks that will dilate your sense of time and create yearnings for psychotropic days and magic carpet maneuvers. Also consider purchasing their split LP (Recorded before their name change from Plantains) with French friars of psych rock, Os Noctambulos, out February 17th on Stolen Body.


Feel free to pay $$$

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Likers - Men of Honor EP (2014)

Philly freaks burnishing your brow with their unique form of candy-coated pop punk. Flaring organs and twang infested riffs sting your heart and taint it with irrefutable love. Currently only obtainable in the futile and intangible format made for lame-asses and dickheads everywhere, mp3's, but soon to be released on cassette via Suicide Bong Tapes and then, with luck, pressed on 10" vinyl sometime in the near future. Don't sleep on it.



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Suicide Bong

Santoros - Ancestros (2012)

This may very well be the best damn twang beset, euphoria inducing, heartache curing flower punk I have ever heard. It's pure elation bottled up in a growler and labeled "Please Enjoy Slowly." Press play and feel every last one of your bad vibes and pesky misgivings stream out of your pores like Niagara Falls during a hurricane. These guys also put out the equally intoxicating Animals cassette last year that was on my 2013 best EP quick list.

Feel free to pay $$$.

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The Red Cords - Dead Heat EP (2013)

UK pubescents, raiding your liquor cabinet for whatever is strongest and if you've got nothing but Malibu and Fireball in there, you might come home to a noxious heap of a turd in the middle of your dining room table. No offense, but man up you pussy! While you're doing internet research on alcohol that wasn't made with vaginal secretion, you might swing by the PNKSLM page and pick up this surfboard swilling raunchfest that easily fits into any drenchers collection.

For your eyeballs...



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